Betty ford says i'm here all night
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
