Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
operation have a gay friend backfired
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
