If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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