u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just gift wrapped bread.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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