they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
