i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
