the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize