Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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