we have officially lost it.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Houston, we have a blender
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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