Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
