I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
