it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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