ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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