That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
