He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
then he tried to convert me to islam
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
