its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
