So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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