she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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