He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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