Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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