I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
