In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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