Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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