i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
