...so i touched it.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
