i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
