You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
