God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
