You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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