It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Still dying that you shit outside
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
