I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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