Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
