Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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