So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
not ubering you a puppy
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize
