I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
someone owes me an orgasm
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
