he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
