Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i dont even know how to be here
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize