he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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