Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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