so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
