no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
