Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
