is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize