U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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