So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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