i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
