return my video game
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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