his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
