farters have to be the big spoon...
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
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