You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
