Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
